Moving Out - Phase 1
I am currently, very make-shift style, living in a portion of the basement.
I want to leave and just start over but it isn't that easy and I feel very fortunate that I am capable of having some space I can run off too.
In no way is it ideal. The first week was rough; he would keep finding excuses to come down and enter my area and would end up staying and arguing.
I did tell him when I was first considering moving my items that there are rules that need to be followed while that is my space - no entering. However he struggled and still struggles.
He has become very clingy since I have moved into my basement space and isn't in a hurry to help me move all of my belongings into it. - I can see in his eyes that he expects I'll change my mind since he is on "good behavior" aka being optimistic and hasn't had a drink in 2 weeks.
It is hard to be mean and distant when he being so nice and acting the way I want. But I just keep reminding myself that this has happened too many times to count and it is one of the big reasons I have stayed so long.
I have to break this cycle, I cannot expect for him to change anymore - I am taking my life and happiness into my own hands.
Ironically I have always disliked the basement and have spent little time in it since we moved into this house 4 years ago. Suddenly now it is my retreat; my free retreat anyways.
The thought of working and paying my bills all on my own in my own place us scary, I haven't done that since I was 18 or 19 and I still had a roommate.
So why am I in the basement and not him?
Why haven't I gone and stayed somewhere else?
1. The kids don't know.
2. I work early and leave the kids sleeping with him at home till I get back.
3. Money.
4. "He didn't do anything wrong to deserve being kicked out"
5. "I'm the one that wants to leave"
I want to leave and start over, I cannot afford this house on my pay - he can.
I want to date and have fun.
Right now I feel like a sitting duck waiting till I can have an appointment with my lawyer to know how I should move forward without screwing myself out of anything.
I want to leave and just start over but it isn't that easy and I feel very fortunate that I am capable of having some space I can run off too.
In no way is it ideal. The first week was rough; he would keep finding excuses to come down and enter my area and would end up staying and arguing.
I did tell him when I was first considering moving my items that there are rules that need to be followed while that is my space - no entering. However he struggled and still struggles.
He has become very clingy since I have moved into my basement space and isn't in a hurry to help me move all of my belongings into it. - I can see in his eyes that he expects I'll change my mind since he is on "good behavior" aka being optimistic and hasn't had a drink in 2 weeks.
It is hard to be mean and distant when he being so nice and acting the way I want. But I just keep reminding myself that this has happened too many times to count and it is one of the big reasons I have stayed so long.
I have to break this cycle, I cannot expect for him to change anymore - I am taking my life and happiness into my own hands.
Ironically I have always disliked the basement and have spent little time in it since we moved into this house 4 years ago. Suddenly now it is my retreat; my free retreat anyways.
The thought of working and paying my bills all on my own in my own place us scary, I haven't done that since I was 18 or 19 and I still had a roommate.
So why am I in the basement and not him?
Why haven't I gone and stayed somewhere else?
1. The kids don't know.
2. I work early and leave the kids sleeping with him at home till I get back.
3. Money.
4. "He didn't do anything wrong to deserve being kicked out"
5. "I'm the one that wants to leave"
I want to leave and start over, I cannot afford this house on my pay - he can.
I want to date and have fun.
Right now I feel like a sitting duck waiting till I can have an appointment with my lawyer to know how I should move forward without screwing myself out of anything.
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